reading old journals

I’ve been reading through old posts, mostly looking for this one that I linked to in another old post, but since my permalinks have changed six ways from sunday (what a fun phrase, technically, it’s only been three ways since sunday), the link was/is broken. (I still haven’t found the post I was looking for.)

Point? Was there a point? The point is that my posts, even the longer ones, are totally unfocused and pointless. Maybe especially the longer ones.

This is not to say that I don’t say anything… (HA!) just that all my rants are about six different things at once. I’ve been trying to add categories to all the old posts I read (hey, why not?), and I’m finding myself checking boxes for at least two or three categories per post. And these are broad categories!

Anyway, what I meant to get to with this post is how reading my old posts feels a lot like reading excerpts from my journal. I guess I’m getting a bit nostalgic. I read this stuff and flashes of memory are jarred into the present. It’s not re-living moments, but it’s like reliving a very narrow slice of a moment. Like a phrase, or a glance, or an image… a tiny sliver of the whole memory suddenly jumps out at me, not supplanting the present, because the present is so much larger, but supplanting one tiny sliver of the present.

Is it worthwhile, this nostalgia? I guess it’s compelling, and that’s enough. For sure it’s as worthwhile as any other non-productive activity. And are non-productive activities worthwhile? That’s a different question, and one that’s bigger than this blog post. I think my inclination is to say no… but that doesn’t mean that I don’t take part in non-productive activities on a daily basis.

Hmmm… This begs the question: What is a non-productive activity? I basically mean anything that does not directly lead to the creation of something. So for me, common ones are playing video games, reading, watching TV. Hell, even eating counts, really. So I guess we’re forced to participate in some of these activities, and maybe the goal is just to maximize your productive to non-productive “time spent” ratio. I guess it depends on how you count work, but I’m guessing my ratio is very low right now. I’m sort of planning to raise the bar after x-mas/new years, when I’ll begin creating my new video game in earnest.

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